Can't hold it in

Today on my routine drive back from Nashville I could not hold back the tears in my eyes. It was supposed to be yet another appointment with Maddy's orthopedist at Vanderbilt, but it turned out to be something much more. Her brace shoes that she started wearing a few weeks ago did not work out. Her tender little feet could not handle the tight leather high-tops fixed to a metal bar, and she quickly developed blisters on the tops and bottoms of her feet. Within a week of getting those shoes, she was put back in casts. After 2 weeks of casts, we tried the shoes again, and just like the first time, the blisters took over. My heart broke. I knew that if the blisters returned, the orthopedist was going to put her legs in casts again and schedule surgery. The surgery is a simple procedure where he puts her to sleep under anesthesia and clips her achilles tendon on each foot. It's simple, yet very emotional for me that it has to be done at all. I cannot stand for my babies to undergo any surgery, and unfortunately, they all have. So I dreaded today's appointment. My dread led me to do a little online research about clubfoot braces, and to my pleasant surprise I found a newer one that allows the baby's feet to move independently. It is supposed to help reduce the risk of blisters and encourage development for crawling and walking. Today I asked the orthopedist about this brace, and he surprisingly agreed to try it. No surgery was scheduled! So on Wednesday Maddy will get her new brace along with some new sandal shoes to go on it, and we will keep our fingers crossed that no blisters will form, and she will not need surgery. I dodged a bullet, and all the worry that was building up inside me was released on the way home as I got all teary eyed thinking about my baby girl sleeping better because she'll be able to move her feet, learning to crawl, and eventually learning to walk with a brace that will help her more than the first one. She's been through so much already, and she's not even 4 months old! I would do anything to make the rest of this long journey easier for her. She's my baby girl.